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Your guide to East Kerry football’s most famous nicknames

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Nicknames are rampant in Ireland and it’s hard to say exactly why.

Maybe using pet names is our way of showing affection. Maybe we just love making fun of one another - certain sobriquets seem to have their roots in funny stories or amusing likenesses. In some instances, alternate names are simply functional, a way of differentiating this John O’Sullivan here from that John O’Sullivan down the road.

Whatever the reasons, nicknames are everywhere and naturally our national games are no exception. Our playing fields have been graced by some superb examples down through the years. Babs. Bomber. Bubbles. Brick. The Rock. The Man. Star. Nudie. Cake. Jelly. Woolly. Fingers. The list goes on and on. I’m not sure where they all came from, and maybe in some instances I don’t want to know.

The dressing room environment is surely a factor in all of this. When 20-plus young men get together three times a week, the storytelling and slagging is bound to produce nicknames, and some of those nicknames are bound to stick.

Killarney (and East Kerry) is no exception.

THE BIG ONE
Let’s address the most famous one first (not just around here but perhaps in the entire sport): The Gooch (Colm Cooper). The man many consider to be the greatest to ever do it got his nickname from his Dr Crokes clubmate Peter O’Brien (aka Head), apparently due to the young mascot’s resemblance to the popular ‘Goochie’ dolls of the time.

Speaking of Crokes, Gooch himself lined out alongside a number of players throughout his career who are perhaps better known by their nicknames. Smiler (Michael Moloney, who inherited the name from his father, Smiler Sr), Melon (David Moloney), Socky (Alan O’Sullivan) and Boo-Boo (James Fleming) are some of the more notable ones, alongside current half back David O’Leary who is widely known as Buddy. The late Martin Beckett was the one who gave O’Leary that moniker: he thought that the toddler from Woodlawn looked like American singer Buddy Holly.

Staying in Lewis Road, the O’Sullivan family boast three famous nicknames: the great Eddie Tatler O’Sullivan, his son Patrick The Bag O’Sullivan, and his other son (current senior manager) Edmund Fox O’Sullivan. The latter and the former are fairly self-explanatory. The Bag, perhaps, less so.

Apparently when Patrick’s father was a selector with the Kerry team he was given an Adidas kitbag which he passed on to Patrick, who was a young lad at the time. He was proud of the bag and carried it everywhere, prompting his friends to say, “Look at Patrick with the bag, it’s as big as himself”. The bag became synonymous with Patrick and that was that.

THE NICKNAME KINGS
As many bynames as there are above in Crokes, they simply cannot compete with the undisputed kings in this particular domain: Gneeveguilla. The small parish just the right side of the Cork border is a veritable hotbed for cognomens. To be honest, I feel bad for anyone back there who doesn't have a nickname. They must feel left out.

Forgie, Slug, Lobster, Spider, Rats, Pebbles, Fuzz, Mops, Bawnie, Stones, Blondie Mike, Curly, Horse, Fox, Badger, Mosquito and, believe it or not, Chesty La Rue have all represented Gneeveguilla with distinction, as has a player with one of the more interesting nicknames around, Pharaoh (Donie O’Connor). The man himself explains how that one came about.

“The GAA club in Gneeveguilla used to run a drama competition called Tops of the Parish in the local hall and in the 1980s, as part of one of the comedy sketches, my father was doing a scene where he was a pharaoh.

“After that everyone locally started calling him Pharaoh and subsequently I became known as Young Pharaoh. It has stuck with us since then. It’s funny now how many people wouldn't even know my real name, and just call me Pharaoh.”

Over to Rathmore and another unusual leasainm catches the eye: the club’s captain when they won the East Kerry Championship in 2015, 2016 and 2017 is affectionately known as Bonze (Brendan O’Keeffe). Again, I’ll let the player himself enlighten us.

“My dad runs a hardware shop in Rathmore and we had a forklift that was in the business for years called The Bonzer. He claims that I was a little wrecker when I was a young lad, tearing around the place like the forklift. So, I was christened after a forklift, and it has stuck to this day.”

Not to be outdone by their neighbours with their Egyptian, Rathmore also have some Italians in their ranks. Back in the eighties, Zoff (Donal O’Connor) was named after fellow goalkeeper Dino Zoff and later his clubmate Brendan Nagle came to be known as Baggio after legendary striker Roberto Baggio.

Speaking of Rathmore, another star from the eighties (and also my uncle-in-law) Dan O’Leary is more commonly known as The Knife. Meanwhile, his son, Dan Jr, is known to his friends as The Dagger. A similar pattern can be found in Gneeveguilla where you have the aforementioned Stones (Michael Murphy) and his younger brother Pebbles (Donal Murphy), and out in Firies where you have Bush (James O’Donoghue) and his younger brother Shrub (Shane O’Donoghue).

LEGION
Heading back towards town and Legion have Beano (Kevin Breen), Shadow (Danny Sheahan), the great Mixie (James) Palmer, and of course not forgetting the legendary Weeshie (Aloysius Fogarty), who got his famous nickname from his pals on New Street who were unable to correctly pronounce his “posh” first name.

Spa have no shortage of nicknames either. Chief amongst them is veteran forward Stam (Mike O’Donoghue), and I can tell you the origin story of this one myself because I was actually present when he got it.

Mike was a teammate of mine underage at Killarney Athletic and he turned up for training one morning wearing a Manchester United jersey and sporting a buzz cut. Skinheaded Dutch defender Jaap Stam was at United at the time, so Mike really walked into that one.

Other well-known Spa nicknames include Batt (Eoin and Cormac Cronin, a name they inherited from their father, Johnny) and The Kid (Ryan O’Carroll), and an honourable mention must go to what is surely the cleverest and most delicious nickname around: Chili (Con Kearney).

Kilcummin have Todd (Shane McSweeney) and Dodge (DJ Fleming), Currow have Buff (Michael McCarthy), Glenflesk have Shaky (Michael O’Shea), there’s a Spoon (Jerh O’Sullivan) from Firies and in Fossa you’ll even find Snakes (Kenneth Clifford).

There are scores more at the clubs mentioned above and elsewhere but the names are far too numerous (and, in some cases, far too inappropriate) to share.

So, with all that in mind, what makes a good nickname? In truth, I don’t really think there’s such a thing as a “good” or “bad” nickname. There are simply nicknames that stick and nicknames that don’t. Some are funny, some aren’t. Some make sense, some don’t. Either way, plenty of them tend to stick around these parts - whether the bearer likes it or not.

As one player who has a funny-but-slightly-embarrassing-if-you-know-the-whole-story nickname told me this week: “It’s funny how someone can come along one day and just change your name, but there really isn’t a whole pile you can do about it.

“If it sticks, it sticks.”

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Killarney girls rack up big score in Cork

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The Killarney RFC U18.5 girls team are in pre-season mode and they laid down a marker for the upcoming season with an impressive 54-24 victory over Ballincollig.

Killarney fielded a relatively inexperienced side in the challenge match at a sun-drenched Tanner Park but they started strongly with tries by Ali O’Donoghue and  Bronagh Dorrian.

Some excellent play by Orna Driver set up the score of the day by Katie O’Donoghue,  who went on a super run and fended off a number of opponents before touching down. The try was duly converted by Fia Whelan.

The try scorers were: Fia Whelan, Ali O’Donoghe, Bronagh Dorrian x 2, Lilly Morris x 2, Molly Jenkinson and Katie O’Donoghue with seven conversations from both Whelan and Dorrian.

“It was fantastic to have the girls back out playing a match,” joint coach Diarmuid O’Malley said. “Some of the rugby the girls played was of the highest standard.”

“We are very excited with the number of girls playing rugby at the club and we want to encourage anyone who is thinking of giving it a try to pop up on a Wednesday evening at 7pm. U14, U16 and U18.5 players all welcome.”

KILLARNEY: 1. Emer O’Keeffe, 2. Becca McGrath, 3. Lily Morris (Joint Captain), 4. Orna Driver, 5. Becci Fleming, 6. Clodagh Foley, 7. Katie O’Donoghue, 8. Ava O’Malley, 9. Robyn Landers, 10. Fia Whelan (Joint Captain), 11. Ellen Considine, 12. Bronagh Dorrian, 13. Ali O’Donoghue, 14. Marina Eagar, 15. Molly Jenkinson. Coaches: Diarmuid O’Malley, Josh Whelan, Liam Murphy. Team Manager: Jenna.

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New-look Lakers ready for big tip-off

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Last year the Scotts Lakers were left to rue a slow start when they missed out on the playoffs by a single basket. With that in mind, starting off on the right foot is sure to be a priority this time around.

The Lakers get their 2022/23 National League Division 1 season up and running on Saturday, October 1 with a home game against the Limerick Sport Eagles. When they take to the court at Killarney Sports & Leisure Centre there will be a new enough look to the team.

Foreign imports Godwin Boahen and Emilian Grudov have moved on during the off-season and have been replaced by American shooter Eric Cooper Jr, Dutch ball carrier Esebio Strijdhaftig and Ukrainian big man Dmytro Berozkin.

Cooper Jr is a graduate of Pepperdine University and his eye for a basket has been evident in pre-season. His 84 three-pointers in a single season is the third best haul in Pepperdine’s history. Bosman player Strijdhaftig plays point guard and he was very adept in defence and in taking the ball to the rim at his previous club Almere (Netherlands).

Berozkin will be endeavouring to use his 6’10” frame to his advantage in both offence and defence. He has represented his native Ukraine at U16, U18 and U20 level. Now based in Killarney, he will be looking to settle quickly into the pace of the league.

Rui Saravia – the Portuguese player who signed last season – is staying put and with local lads Mark O’Shea and Paul Clarke also committed (GAA commitments in the short term allowing), the Lakers are expecting to put out a strong starting five.

Teenagers Jamie O’Sullivan and Senan O’Leary will be looking to add minutes to their court time and, the more he played, David Gleeson improved immeasurably as a force at both ends last season.

The squad will be further boosted by the presence of Irish underage international Ronan Collins, who, like Gleeson, is a Gneeveguilla native. Collins had a very impressive record in the green of Ireland and once he settles into the league he will be a real asset to the squad.

Marko Benčić, the son of former Lakers coach Vojkan, contributed hugely to the scoring effort in the latter part of last season’s league campaign. He will be looking to push on again in 2022/23.

The club will, as always, be looking to harvest the potential of their outstanding underage structure and young guns Mark Sheahan, Jack O’Sullivan and Eoin Carroll – amongst others – will be involved with the squad. Another addition to the squad is Jamie Cooke who is well known for his basketball prowess with the Kerry Stars club.

That sluggish start in 2021 was mitigated somewhat by players being unavailable and the fact that their home venue was being used as a makeshift vaccination centre (their first four home games were staged at alternative venues).

There should be no such excuses this time around and coach Jarlath Lee will be hoping for a positive opening month that includes three home games here in Killarney. The other Limerick side, the Celtics, will visit the town on October 22 and Cork outfit Fr Mathews will cross the county bounds on October 30.

The sole road trip in October is to Waterford to take on the SETU Waterford Vikings October 8. The league is a little more arduous this season in terms of travel; with away days in Donegal and Dublin, a large, functioning squad is vital.

St Paul’s have once again expressed their gratitude to the team’s main sponsor, Maurice O’Donoghue of Scotts Hotel. The O’Donoghue family’s legacy in supporting Killarney basketball goes back over 40 years.

The club is also seeking additional support via the following initiatives: Season Ticket (€100) – Admission to all nine home National League and cup games; Patron Ticket (€150) – Admission for two adults to all nine home National League and cup games; Game Sponsor (€300) – Admission for two to all nine home National League and cup games, your business name featured on the front of your sponsored game programme, and your business name attached to all advertising for the game on social media, local written media and on Radio Kerry previews and reports.

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