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A bit of understanding goes a long way

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There’s a lot of negativity floating about at the minute. The upcoming referendum on repealing the Eighth Amendment has been hugely contentious so far and we’re still a full month out from the vote. A whole bunch of people feel very strongly about it on both sides and, as a result, debates get very heated very quickly. I would never discourage someone from being passionate about something, especially when it comes to an issue as important as abortion, but if we really want to have a conversation, a bit of understanding could go a long way.

Personally, I’m pro-choice. I think the current legislation is dangerous and equating the life of a foetus to the life of a woman is, to my mind, unreasonable. I also believe that women should have the freedom to decide what’s right for their own bodies, and it’s sad that they have to ask for our permission in the first place. A lot of you might feel as though abortion should remain illegal but, as entitled as you are to your opinion, I fundamentally disagree. I suppose that’s why we’re having a referendum.

When people differ on a subject this emotive, tensions often flare and friendly chats turn argumentative in the blink of an eye. But what does that actually achieve? Maybe it might make you feel a bit better about yourself. You might leave the interaction thinking, “Jeez, I made a right fool out of that fella on Facebook,” or, “I wasn’t long quietening her,” but is your goal to convince or to ridicule? Taking the piss out of someone on the other side or denigrating their beliefs isn’t going to change their mind. If anything, slating the other campaign is more likely to fortify it than break it down.

The only way of reaching someone is by having an actual conversation with them, and to do that you have to make a genuine effort to understand where they’re coming from.

Why does something that seems so inherently right to me, seem inherently wrong to someone, say, 25 years older than me? (I don’t want to generalise but the rift in this particular instance does appear to be largely generational.) I think about this quite a bit. In 25 years’ time, will a new law be proposed that we whole-heartedly oppose, but our future children insist must be passed in the name of progress?

It’s a scary enough thought – especially as we’re part of a generation who consider ourselves to be very liberal and open-minded - but it’s entirely possible. And it opens your eyes to the fact that we think the way we do for a reason. We are, to a large extent, products of our environment. When it comes down to it, I feel the way I do about abortion because of factors like my upbringing, the people around me and the cultural influences I’ve been exposed to. The same is true for those on the other side of this debate. We’re basically the same. For whatever reason, we just ended up on different sides of this specific divide.

When you look at it from that perspective, you can talk to someone and say, “Right, I completely understand where you’re coming from but this is where I’m coming from…” With this kind of approach, maybe you’ll be able to change a mind or two before May 25 - regardless of whether you’re voting ‘yes’ or ‘no’.

And even if it doesn’t work, it’s a lot better than slagging each other off on Twitter for the next four weeks.

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Massive Park Road housing development given green light

A private developer has been given planning permission to build 249 new residential units at Upper Park Road. The development, which will be built on a recently cleared site near […]

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A private developer has been given planning permission to build 249 new residential units at Upper Park Road.

The development, which will be built on a recently cleared site near An Post’s sorting office, will include a variety of properties from five-bed houses to single apartments, along with a crèche and over 500 car spaces and over 300 bike spaces.

The development has been welcomed by local councillor Martin Grady.

“Killarney has a massive housing shortage so this is very positive. It will retain young families in the area, stimulating economic growth,” he said. “After 17 years of different planning applications it’s finally coming to fruition.”

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Ballydribeen residents living in fear due to anti-social behaviour

Residents in the Ballydribeen are living in fear as a result of increased anti-social behaviour in the estate. Several serious incidents in the estate have resulted in several Garda visits […]

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Residents in the Ballydribeen are living in fear as a result of increased anti-social behaviour in the estate.

Several serious incidents in the estate have resulted in several Garda visits in the last week.

Local councillor Martin Grady told the Killarney Advertiser that residents are “living in fear” as a result of very serious incidents in the last week alone.

One house in the estate was badly damaged when fire crackers were placed inside a letter box.

Another house had its windows smashed in over the weekend.

“It’s a major problem,” added Grady after meeting residents there earlier this week.

One of the most serious incidents occurred on Tuesday night.

A passing motorists had rocks thrown at his car while driving along the bypass whch is adjacent to the estate.
Taking to social media, local primary-school teacher Pádraig O’Sullivan posted:

“Travelling home tonight, at 11.05pm on the Killarney side of the bypass our car was hit by a rock – not a pebble – from the Ballydribben side , which hit the passenger door.

“It was centimetres away from hitting the window where my father, who is visually impaired, was sitting.

“This could have caused catastrophic permanent injury to him.

“The Killarney Garda were on the scene within three minutes.

“They can’t be patrolling the bypass all night.

“It comes down to parenting. You should know where your children are at this hour and be able to teach them what’s funny and what ruin a person’s life or cause a fatal crash.“

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