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Marie Meets…….Rory D’Arcy who is saying goodbye to St Oliver’s after 20 years

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School has been part of Rory D'Arcy's life since the age of three. As he bids farewell to his teaching career and begins a new career as a Senior National Advisor to Catholic Primary Schools with the Managers Association, our new columnist Marie Carroll-O'Sullivan caught up with him for a chat to find out how he's feeling.

‘Enter to learn & Exit to lead’. What an appropriate sign to greet me as I visited exiting Principal, Rory D’Arcy at a much quieter St Oliver’s National School this week. It was lunch time in Ballycasheen and the Spúnóg take away was on the menu which I enjoyed with Rory as we chatted in the beautiful 20 degree sunshine. Principal Rory D’Arcy has been attending school since the age of 3. “The 1st Sept 2021 will be the first year I am not in attendance at school in some shape or form. I was an early starter to ‘make up the numbers’ in Sligo Marie. I did my Leaving Cert at the age of 16 and was teaching in Ballyboden in Dublin at the age of 19, in May 1988”. After almost two decades as Principal at St Olivers NS, Rory will remain working in education as a Senior National Advisor to Catholic Primary Schools with the Managers Association in September 2021, over seeing project work and giving advise on training to many of these 2,800 primary schools in Ireland. No better man for such a position I thought. An inspirational, innovative man with magical leadership qualities. As we ate lunch I asked about the outdoor covering in my view, which stretched across an internal play area. It was magnificent. A cream tent like cloth covering complete with equally impressive perimeter bulb lighting. The Shire eat your heart out!! “We got ahead of the pubs on that one Marie. We use it for daily assembly and recently held the 6th Class Graduation here also” Rory explained. That’s Rory all over. Always thinking ahead in thinking of others. “So what brought you to Kerry” I asked. “Love is a wonderful thing!” Rory laughed. I met my wife Siobhan who is a teacher & Deputy Principal at Barraduff National School. We were both attending St Pat’s together. We spent 11 year in Dublin. Siobhan in Kocklyon and myself between Ballyboden & Tallaght before I took up my four and a half year post at Raheen NS. “Will I meet you at the gate?” I

"Enter to learn and exit to lead" - what an appropriate sign to greet me as I visited exiting Principal Rory D’Arcy at a much quieter St Oliver’s National School this week.

It was lunch time in Ballycasheen and the Spúnóg Take Away was on the menu which I enjoyed with Rory as we chatted in the beautiful 20 degree sunshine. 

Rory has been attending school since the age of three.

“September 1, 2021 will be the first year I am not in attendance at school in some shape or form. I was an early starter to ‘make up the numbers’ in Sligo. I did my Leaving Cert at the age of 16 and was teaching in Ballyboden in Dublin at the age of 19, in May 1988.”

After almost two decades as Principal at St Olivers NS, Rory will remain working in education as a Senior National Advisor to Catholic Primary Schools with the Managers Association this coming September, overseeing project work and giving advice on training to many of these 2,800 primary schools in Ireland.

No better man for such a position I thought. An inspirational, innovative man with magical leadership qualities.

As we ate lunch I asked about the outdoor covering in my view, which stretched across an internal play area. It was magnificent. A cream tent like cloth covering complete with equally impressive perimeter bulb lighting. “We got ahead of the pubs on that one Marie. We use it for daily assembly and recently held the Sixth Class graduation here also,” Rory explained.

That’s Rory all over. Always thinking ahead.

A KILLARNEY CAREER

“So what brought you to Kerry,” I asked. “Love is a wonderful thing!” Rory laughed. "I met my wife Siobhan who is a teacher and Deputy Principal at Barraduff National School. We were both attending St Pat’s together. We spent 11 years in Dublin, Siobhan in Knocklyon and myself between Ballyboden and Tallaght before I took up my four and a half year post at Raheen NS.

“Will I meet you at the gate?” I remember Principal Brendan Walsh (RIP) asking me as I arrived at the gates of St Oliver's.

"Not at all I said to Brendan. I remember that first day so well and the butterflies I had at the size of the school and my new position. I then thought to myself how it must feel for a little child entering the gates on their first day. In my opinion one of the most important things is a welcome, no matter what industry you work in. My aim was to welcome every child no matter what, even if they broke your heart the day before,” Rory laughed. “I think it’s so important.”

FROM PUPILS TO STAFF

I thought to myself the number of welcomes Rory gives daily and asked how many pupils are in attendance at St Oliver's.

“When I arrived at St Oliver's there were 410 students and today we have 680. We help more children with additional needs than any other school in the country, some of which travel the Ring of Kerry to school daily. We have 60 teachers and 26 SNAs and would you believe some of our teachers today were pupils during my term as principal too - Aoife O’Carroll, Gavin O’Shea, Amy O’Shea and Gemma O’Mahoney to name a few.”

“And how many nationalities attend St Oliver’s,” I asked.

"One” Rory replied. I loved that answer and I knew exactly what he meant. “All the children at St Oliver’s NS are Irish Marie. We have a colour coded system here - light blue and dark blue - the colours of our uniform, and red and yellow. You will get green if you mix blue and yellow and you will get orange if you mix yellow and red. Together with white they are the colours of the Irish flag. I remember one little girl who arrived at school in the most beautiful Bangladeshi clothing. I admired her appearance and asked her where she was from to which she replied "I am from Pinewood". There’s your answer Marie. As John Hume said "difference is an accident of birth". We are proud to say that we have many Irish speaking awards from Conradh na Gaeilge.”

I later noticed the rock over Rory’s shoulder which reads St Oliver's in Ogham script, a medieval alphabet used to write the early Irish language.

To conclude we needed a photo to go with my chat with Rory so we took a walk around the back of the school. Another forward thinking COVID friendly classroom, 'The Spooky Garden'. It was so impressive (but way too dark for photography sorry!), another amazing outdoor classroom option within the existing forest grounds, complete with actual tree stumps as seats for each child.

LIFE AT ST OLIVER'S

“Rory, before I put down the pen and paper, can you describe your time at St Oliver's in five words for me?"
Off the cuff he wasn’t phased one bit.

“Big, diverse, fun, busy and happy,” Rory replied. “Diversity breaks down immeasurable barriers and I think St Oliver’s is reflected in Killarney town. It’s a ‘can do’ town. Did you know that the Racecourse, the Town Hall and the Golf Club were all built in the 1930s, and look at how Killarney has adapted so well to COVID-19 with outdoor dining. Killarney is an amazing town of innovation.

As we chatted and snapped Rory explained to me how the Sixth Class pupils Callista, Mark, Nell and William were involved in a programme called CRAG (Children’s Research Advisory Group) with architect and parent Mary O’Connell of MRG, together with teacher Ciaran O Muircheartaigh and Rory himself in the design of two new classrooms to replace two existing prefabs. I was so impressed with this. It reminded me of that Benjamin Franklin quote "Tell me and I forget, teach me and I remember and involve me and I will learn”. So true.

ONE LAST QUESTION

Photoshoot over I had one last question for Rory; “What will you miss the most about St Oliver's NS?"

“The team. The team at St Oliver's are everything. They are exceptional people to work with Marie. I could not have asked for better over my 19 years here. I have been very blessed to be Principal at such a beautiful school in an equally beautiful town. Yes there were hard times too, but the happy memories that lie here outweigh those by far. Change is good and I really hope I will be as happy in my new position as I have been at St Oliver's.”

All the very best in your future career and thank you for having me at St Oliver’s NS Rory.

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From silence to connection: Neil Kelders returns to Killarney to give back and talk mental health

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When I first moved from The Premier to The Kingdom, Neil Kelders was the familiar face behind the bar at the Tatler Jack. I thought I knew him, but I didn’t really know him at all. His story, like so many untold stories in our community, is a powerful reminder of why mental health matters, and why checking in on friends and family is so crucial.

Mental Health Week took place in the second week of October, and although this feature comes a little late, the timing is still perfect. Neil is giving back to his hometown, hosting a free parent workshop on raising resilient teens.  It takes place at Killarney Racecourse on Thursday, November 13 at 7pm. His mission is simple but profound: honest conversation can change everything. No tea, no biscuits, just FaceTime and conversation. 

I sat down with Neil to talk about his upcoming workshop.

Neil, the evening at Killarney Racecourse is a beautiful gesture. What inspired you to host it here in your hometown?

My first mental-health talk was in Killarney ten years ago. This town shaped me, so coming back isn’t nostalgic, it’s needed. Parents are still afraid, teens overwhelmed, families unsure how to bridge the gap. Change starts at home with small, human actions. The Racecourse felt right, full of life and community. When I mentioned it to Ollie, he said yes before I finished. That’s Killarney, people who show up.

You’ve said this event is about “giving back.” What does that mean to you personally?

I feel it’s my duty. I hid my struggles for twenty years. Learning to manage them gave me a responsibility to share what helps. When I told my story, messages came from parents, teens, strangers. Honesty opens doors. My mental health is strong, but I still have hard days. Recovery isn’t perfection, it’s showing what’s possible.

You’ve invited clubs, schools, and groups across all divides. What do you hope people take away?

Mental health touches every home, club, school and group. We’ve all got our boxes. Parent, coach, teacher, teen, but none of us has been here before. We’re learning as we go. I want people to leave lighter and more connected, reminded that honest conversations change everything.

You’ve built a reputation for helping people find a way forward using what actually works. What does that look like in practice?

“What works” means tools you can use today, not theory for tomorrow.

In coaching and workshops, that can mean pausing before reacting or small resets that steady a home. It’s not about fixing anyone, it’s helping them move forward with calm, clarity, and courage.

Can you share a bit about your journey, how you came to this line of work?

I was the class clown, always “grand.” I wasn’t. I lived with depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts for two decades. The first person I confided in was my sister-in-law. I felt a weight lifted but it was only the start. You don’t talk once, and it’s gone, you keep talking. At Pieta House, two counsellors didn’t fit; the third did. She challenged me, then said: “Someone else might be a better fit now.” That honesty changed me. Everyone had helped, but I still had to take responsibility. That was the turning point, stop waiting to be rescued, start rebuilding.

Your book The Other Side has resonated widely. What message do you hope people carry?

Getting through tough times isn’t a straight line. It’s messy, human, and possible. You don’t need it all figured out, just do something. The book shows what rebuilding really looks like: slip-ups, small wins, learning to live again. Change will start when you act.

You’ve worked with parents, teenagers, and organisations. What’s one common challenge you see?

Disconnection. Parents fear saying the wrong thing, teenagers think no one understands, adults pretend they’re fine. When people don’t feel heard, they stop talking. My work breaks that silence, listening without fixing, supporting without fear. When people feel safe to be real, things change.

How do you keep mental health relatable, especially for teens?

By being real. Teens spot fake instantly. I don’t arrive with answers, we find them together. They help decide what’s shared with parents; that trust matters. We talk about goals, values, and what they want from life. Sometimes it’s “burn your thoughts” or a quick reset; sometimes it’s just listening. Once they see they don’t have to be perfect, things shift.

What would you say to parents who feel guilty or unsure?

You’re not meant to have all the answers. Keep showing up, even when you don’t know how. Your job isn’t to fix your teenage child, it’s to help them feel safe enough to talk. You can’t do that if you’re running on empty. A walk, a pause, five minutes of breathing, it helps. Presence beats perfection.

For teenagers, what’s one message you hope they’ll hear?

You’re not broken. You’re feeling more than you can handle right now, that’s being human. When I was your age, I hid for years. If you’ve spoken up, even once, you’re already twenty years ahead of me. What you’re feeling can seem endless, but it isn’t. There’s more ahead. Calm, laughter, and moments you can’t imagine yet. Keep moving, and don’t do it alone.

Are we getting better at talking about mental health?

We’re talking more but not always listening better. Awareness is great but it isn’t action. We quote “one in four,” but I could never have been a stat, I wore the mask too well. Others are hiding too. We have more language now, but not always the safety to use it. Stigma hasn’t gone; it’s changed shape. Awareness matters; connection changes lives. If someone leaves feeling hopeful but unsure where to start, what’s one step they can take? Start small. Check in with one person tomorrow. Ask, “How are you, really?” and mean it. Don’t fix, show up.

What does this community mean to you?

Killarney shaped me, the good and the hard. It’s where I stayed silent and where I found my voice again. We’re not meant to do life alone. Connection holds us together.

If people remember one thing from the evening, what would you love it to be?

Things can get better. Not perfect, just better. If you change nothing, nothing changes. Do something.

What’s next for you?

More of this. Real conversations that make a difference. I’m continuing parent-teen coaching and community workshops across Ireland, the UK, and Canada, and working with companies to build workplaces where people can speak up safely. The focus now is partnerships and reach, so families get help before crisis. I’m really looking forward to next Thursday night at the Racecourse.  Its free and all are welcome.  Be sure to register at events.neilkelders.com.  It’s not about perfection or having all the answers. It’s about connection, courage, and showing up. Join me, and let’s start together.

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Kilcummin Mothers & Others quiz raises over €1,800 for charity

Kilcummin Gaelic Mothers & Others hosted a hugely successful Halloween-themed table quiz last Friday night at the Kilcummin Klub Bar and GAA Hall, raising over €1,800 for charity. The event […]

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Kilcummin Gaelic Mothers & Others hosted a hugely successful Halloween-themed table quiz last Friday night at the Kilcummin Klub Bar and GAA Hall, raising over €1,800 for charity.

The event saw an excellent turnout of more than 130 people, with funds set to be split between Temple Street Children’s Hospital and the local Kilcummin Mothers & Others ladies football team.
Many attendees embraced the Halloween spirit by arriving in “Spooktacular” costumes, adding to the fun of the evening. Organisers noted that the “Big Raffle,” supported by generous local businesses and individuals who contributed prizes, played a significant part in the successful financial outcome.
Quiz Master Derek O’Leary put participants through their paces with a variety of challenging questions. Team member Catriona Doolan, one of the organisers, described the evening as “undoubtedly a great social evening for all in attendance,” confirming that a family fun night was had by all.
Organisers extended their gratitude to Kilcummin GAA, as well as John O’Sullivan and staff for facilitating the event and providing a wonderful array of finger food at half-time. Thanks were also given to Nessa and Declan for supplying the sound system.
The Kilcummin Mothers & Others group is always open to new members. Those wishing to join the vibrant and fun-active group can contact Ann Marie on 087 9047274.

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